Rest in peace, little birdie.
Home from Dreamworks, this movie did everything it needed to and added on more to it. “post-movie discussion/talk” is what we used to do after watching a show and this habit started since our first movie “Beautiful Mind” 10 years back. We would talk about the content of the movie, the value and all. Sound weird? That was also part of the reasons why I was not a moviegoer as I was pretty fussy over lousy movies, I found watching movies a waste of time and money, if I had to go, the show had to be something worth my time for. But this 90 minutes cartoon, we had so much to talk about after watching!
– running away from problems doesn’t help
– when problems occur, face it and deal with it
– sometimes problems aren’t as big/serious as you think
– be sincere to friends
– be helpful in anyway you can
– do the right things
– be thoughtful and be tactful, some hurtful words can be lasting damage to others
– don’t just follow others, have faith in ownself
– never give up
For the first time, I saw my emotional child cried while watching cartoon, the moment we all thought Oh was died, he hugged me real tight and started sobbing. He was so sad that he couldn’t bring himself to watch anymore and wanted to leave the cinema. I was shocked, so were daddy. Luckily the ending turned out well, he left the cinema feeling happy and repeatedly saying,” my hands are in the air, like I just do not care.”
Such cleaver cartoon/comedy that I will say this is suitable for everyone at any age, it delivers positive messages to young kids, be more understanding and never afraid to overcome obstacles. While some claimed that the storyline was unimaginative and predictable, my boy found the cuddly cute alien Oh so irresistible, funny and entertaining. (so, yes, money and time are well spent.) On a another hand, I found this book and thought it came just in time as he is now learning how to keep his friends.
Side note: I was never a moviegoer and but I am now for my son and husband.
I always share recipe but I can’t tell the exact amount of ingredients I used because I never measure, ask all the housewives who cook, they may tell you the same thing. It’s not like baking bake or bread, use the wrong type of sugar and I guarantee you the result will be a lot different from what you expect.
Anyway, I’m not going to take credit, the recipe for this sauce is all over the Internet, so are some of other dishes I’ve cooked. Most of the time, I don’t even follow the recipes but recreate my dish because I have limited condiments and seasonings at home. Who am I to kid? I’m just a housewife who loves to cook, has to cook daily and always prefer to prepare dinner in the simplest way. Why some people cook something or recreate some dishes and start claiming it is their recipes with the © symbol?
We have been using digital countdown timer for time out as well as playground time for more than a year now and it works well, no more power struggling, arguments and nagging (most importantly). Imaging yourself asking a child to leave his favourite playground, from asking nicely to asking repeatedly, then giving warning to threatening to leave, trust me, some parents blow their top on the bad days. Actually, parents just want to tell them, “it’s time to leave” but are we sending the right message or are they recieving the message?
I’m sharing my method on how to get him out of the playground without struggling using a timer :
– Get him to set the timer, let him be the one who controls the time frame. (older child will have sense of controlling and he will learn to time himself)
– it has to be reasonable, within an acceptable time frame (if conflicts arrise, give options to prevent power struggling)
– don’t say no straight a way when he asks for 1 hour, explain. (again, use “options” to prevent power struggling)
– set the timer at the begining eg. before entering the playground or when you want him to leave
– before time is up, remind the child (you must prepare the child in advance to prevent major meltdown, if needed, repeat this step)
– once it beeps, get the child to come back to off it, or show it to your child (eye contact is very important for now)
I know, talk is cheap, anything can happen from now onwards, the child may follow and comply, or otherwise. But, be firm, try to Be firm and explain, at least right now, no one is the bad guy but the timer and who set it? kids learn to honour their words and not blaming parents for being mean because now we are using the third party to get him out from the playground as “it wasn’t me, you set the timer and it is beeping now. Let’s go.”
I often say,”remember to keep your promise and I’ll keep mine, be good and we will definitely come back (to the playground).”
like I’ve said, we’ve tried this method and it works well everytime! Now, we no longer need the digital timer but just verbal reminders.
Here is a sand timer, it caught his attention when we went to Daiso and he was fascinated by it. “I just like it, can I have it?” asked Asher. I was hesitated at first but gave in to his request. Back home, I saw him spending time looking at the sand passing through, is it a very calming thing to do? It may or may not has the calming effect for everyone but soon I realise it works for my angry child. You may think it is a total waste of time by staring it, nah, kids loves everything glittering.
To me, an angry child is like an angry adult, his ears are shut and his face is red, he may be scolding non-stop or isolate himself, mine will go on and on saying hurtful words, that moment, I just need something to distract him. Of course, he takes my verbal instructions (keep all nasty words to yourself and stay in your room, come back only when you’re feeling better.) but with sand timer, the time he takes to calm himself is a lot shorter. That’s right, sand timer is a simple time measurement, he knows his sand timer takes 5 minutes to complete one cycle and learns how long 5 minutes is. Conveniently, now this timer is also being used during “homework” and “meal time”. He knows how long he takes to complete his task and it kinda “motivate” him to “move faster”, I don’t rush him all the time but the timer gets him to “self compete”, he gets really excited and proud when he finishes the task before the cycle completes. I see myself using it in near future to time other activities/routine like get dressed/ready to school in the morning.
Besides the sand timer, we start using another tool for him – the Calm Down Jar, or Glittering Jar. I’m not sure if it is available in Singapore but it is easy to make one, all you need are bottle/jar, glitters, water and glue. I didn’t think of making this as my initial plan was to get him the liquid dripping thing like the sand timer but I couldnt find it, I went online to check and saw this Calm Down Jar and decided to make one ourselves. We made it together and I told him the purpose, he agreed to use it. Teachers at the new school are kind, they knew about his behavioural issues and they are all willing to help him, however, everyone was lost and shocked when he suddenly got upset and inconsolable on the second day of school, he dashed out of the room and wanted to leave school, teacher had a hard time comforting him and it took him very long to self regulate. I brought the jar to the school with him and he initiated use of the Calm Down Jar as a self-calming tool to his teacher, he even told them to keep it but hand it to him when he couldn’t control his anger. It is amazing to see my always-angry child tries to regulate himself and accepts ideas/helps from us.
At this point, it is still unknown if he has SPD or ASD, it doesn’t really matter to me, there are many successful people in the world with some incurable disorders, they are surviving, functioning in our society. Come what may, we will “fix it” together.
On this Friday, my sister turned up at door step in the morning because she wanted to see Asher! Yes, unbelievable! She missed him that much and knew she won’t be able to see him for 2 weeks so she came over to see him off. Then we went to Westgate, Jem and Jcube before returning home again to see Asher again. Ben came home much later and ferried all of us to Chinatown for steamboat buffet.
I enjoyed a lot to have someone to spend my afternoon with, be it just tea break or lunch meet up. This Friday was like a “sisters’ day” for us. Our family is not big but when everyone is present at the same time, we can hardly talk to everyone. A 1-1 session like this gives us time to catch up with each other’s lives. In the past, we would go hair salon together and chatted during the hair treatment session. Maybe one day she will move nearer to us then she can see him on daily basis. 😂
Way past sleeping time, instead of lying on the bed, he went to mommy’s garden with daddy. Before I knew it, I heard his hysterical cries and I ran out as quick as possible to check out what had happened.
What a nasty cut! Just right above his left brow. EO lavender applied after I clean his wound. He was pretty upset after he saw the cut, walked into his room and sobbed. I consoled him and assured him the wound will heal in no time and true enough, there was barely a scar after a few days.
From this incident, he learnt not to push the gate but pull it gently. I told him, “just like everything, when you go against the way it should be and push it too hard, it bounces back and hit you hard, sometimes even harder than you can imagine. So, think twice before you act/say anything.”