Tough, parenting is so tough. While I was busy teaching values and all, I didn’t realize my 5yo was overloaded with fairness, play fair, play nicely, do the right thing, don’t be like that, must do this and that, blah blah blah. Until the day I witnessed and heard him saying this to one of the crying baby in school,” this baby is always crying, can you please stop crying? Arrgghhh, this is driving me crazy.”
I almost died of embarrassment. My son is lack of empathy! Has he been treated like this? Is this a norm to him? Why is this okay to him?
Then I soon realized, being empathy is a cognitive skill and not all young children understand the concept, not until they reach 5/6yo. So from that onwards, we pay more attention on nurturing and teaching empathy. Giving responsibility is one of my favorite way to guide him, well, that is how he sees his wrong doing clearly from another angle. After our “discussion”, I told him to offer help if there is any kids crying, after some time, he would tell me he took care of 1 or 2 crying kids in school when teachers were busy. He even used his glittering jar to distract them and started calling small children Flopsy. *yet to verify with teachers*
Expressing own feeling is what we do all the time at home, I realized by doing so, it makes our bond stronger as it builds up our trust. Then I asked for his views on why babies cry, solution/ideas and infused positive thinking on how to deal with them. Lastly, we put them in words and wrote it down.